Parents with numerous children are frustrated when they hear their children arguing or fighting with one another because they expect them to love each other. If you were a fly on the wall in our house, you would hear me occasionally ask one of my three sons, “Were you loving your brother when you said or did such and such a thing?” God has instructed us to love our neighbors, even when they become our enemies. How much more should brothers and sisters have profound and lasting affection for one another? Though we live in a world full of men and women whom we will almost definitely never meet, brothers and sisters are born into the same womb and raised by the same parents in the same home. The tie that occurs between earthly siblings shapes and forms the language of Scripture, where God tells Christians to “love one another with brotherly affection” (Romans 12:10).
The New Testament has numerous allusions to “brotherly love.” This archetypal term appears frequently in the Apostles’ teachings on Christian living in the church. When writing to the members of the church in Thessalonica, the Apostle Paul explained the natural nature of brotherly love: “Concerning brotherly love, you have no need for anyone to write to you, because you yourselves have been taught by God to love one another” (1 Thess. 4:9, emphasis added). The writer of Hebrews advised his audience, “Let brotherly love continue” (Heb 13:1). Simon Peter emphasized the importance of brotherly love in our Christian experience when he wrote, “Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart” (1 Peter 1:22, emphasis added).
He then delivered the following charges to the members of the churches to which he wrote: “Have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind” (1 Peter 3:8, emphasis added); and “Supplement your faith… with brotherly affection” (2 Peter 1:5-7; emphasis added)
The abundance of references to “brotherly love” in the New Testament tells us a fundamental fact about our membership in the Christian community: believers have been adopted into God’s family via faith in God’s Son and live together in the house of God (Heb. 3). The Apostle John emphasized the privilege of adoption into God’s family via faith alone in Christ when he wrote, “To all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God” (John 1:12). God adopted us through His eternal and only Son to stand alongside other sons and daughters in the church. The Son of God has become our elder brother, living, dying, and rising for our salvation.
Most of us think of Jesus as our Prophet, Priest, King, Lord, Savior, Shepherd, Mediator, Advocate, and Judge; but, we occasionally (or frequently) forget to think of Jesus as our Elder Brother. Citing Psalm 22:22, the writer of Hebrews noted Christ’s proclamation to His Father regarding His familial connection to His people: “I will tell of your name to my brothers; in the midst of the congregation I will sing your praise” (Heb. 2:12). The author of Hebrews moves away from judicial abandonment, quoting Psalm 22, which begins with Jesus’ cry of dereliction, “My God, why have you forsaken me?”— to resurrection praise—with Jesus’ shout from Isaiah 8:18, “Behold, I and the children God has given me.” Christ’s sufferings on the cross sealed our adoption into God’s family; Jesus’ resurrection led His followers to glorify God.
What a difference it would make if we could see one another through the lens of our relationship with our exalted Elder Brother, Jesus
Seeing my three sons sing psalms and hymns to God in corporate worship is one of the greatest delights I have had as a parent. When my oldest son sings loudly in worship, his brothers tend to follow suit. If one of my sons sees his older brother singing God’s praises, he is motivated to do the same. This is exactly how things work within the heavenly family. Jesus leads His brethren in singing God’s praises, inspiring them to praise Him for His redemptive mercy and Grace. Edmund Clowney highlighted the essence of Jesus guiding us in worship by writing:
Jesus is the lovely singer of Israel and the choirmaster of heaven. He is not ashamed to address us as brethren, but sings in the midst of His assembled saints in heavenly Zion and on earth wherever two or three are gathered in His name. . . . What agonizing songs does Christ sing—psalms of His suffering that sealed salvation! Listen to and learn about Him through hymns that recognize the companionship of His sufferings, hymns that can arise from a cross or spring from a jail cell at midnight. The singing Savior does not perform songs based on sweet advertising. His songs are sterner, stronger, and deeper, carrying us into the valley of the shadow of death.
As our Elder Brother, Jesus leads a new, redeemed society of men, women, and children who are joined to Him solely by faith. Because of our indivisible unity with Christ, we are now inseparably linked to one another. What is true about our relationship with the Son has a profound impact on our relationship with other Christians. We dwell together with other Christians because of our common adoption. The way Christ leads us ahead in spiritual worship shapes the way we worship with one another. Our Elder Brother loved us and gave His life for us. This, in turn, inspires the way we should love one another as members of His body.
The key to loving other believers with brotherly love is to train ourselves to appropriately consider the other members of God’s family. God wants us to see every believer as someone “for whom Christ died” (Romans 14:15; 1 Corinthians 8:11). God has given His life for the brethren via Christ. We, too, are to give our lives for one another. Jesus was gently born alongside us. We, too, must bear with one another in love. Jesus died to pardon us for our sins. We, too, are to forgive one another. Jesus continues to strengthen us in the truth. We, too, are to uplift one another in the truth. Jesus continues to live and intercede for us. We, too, are supposed to intercede for one another. Jesus has provided for our needs both now and in the future. We, too, are to share our provisions and lives with one another, both now and in eternity.
Unfortunately, this is not often reflected in our interactions with other believers. We all too often treat other believers with wicked partiality and prejudice, as well as bitter coldness and censorship. Nothing is more devastating in our imperfect world than brothers treating one another with contempt or indifference, and nothing is more inappropriate than watching brethren in the church treat one another with loveless apathy.
In The Weight of Glory, C.S. Lewis includes a profound essay on how we should view the church’s weakest believers in light of their adoption into God’s family. His words were this: “The dullest most uninteresting person you can talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship.” Every son and daughter of God will receive glory as a result of Jesus’ resurrection (Rom. 8:19). What we see now when we gaze at one another is vastly different from what we will see in glory.
These beliefs should have the greatest impact on our interactions with fellow believers in this life. What a difference it would make if we could see one other through the lens of our relationship with our glorified Elder Brother. How many disputes could we avoid if we followed these truths? How much sinful ambition would we lay to rest if we educated ourselves to think this way about one another? How much love and care would we show to individuals in the body if we constantly applied this principle to all of our encounters with fellow believers? How much patience and deference would stronger brothers show weaker brothers if we adopted this principle? How much mutual prayer would we make to God for one another if we adopted this mindset? How often would we seek and grant forgiveness to one another if we actually believed these things?
